How I was Mainstreamed


When I was small, I was not exactly outgoing. Social interactions were always my weak point. Over at any guest’s place, however I wanted to eat that biscuit in the plate and however aunties persuaded me to do so, I never picked one up. I did all my stuff with few questions and hardly any objection (but I am not saying I was not lazy!). I enjoyed my time by watching all the drama called life, but never participated in it. Nothing ruffled my hair, so I was content.

On the other hand, my sister used to be the centre of attraction. She was comfortable with crowds, I preferred to run away to solitude. She used to push me to participate in school events. I still remember, I was a recurring figure whenever poem recitation competitions used to take place. And I was a total disaster. Only once did I completed my poem. Otherwise, I used to stare at the crowd (which stared back rudely at me), fidgeting and straining hard to remember the next line. But failure after failure, year after year, I went back to stage. It was only much later I realised that I am not made for these things.

The biggest change that turned me around was my new home. Almost a landmark event that I always underestimated. Slowly and steadily, I learnt that I could move about alone. I started making my own small decisions. There was a democratic and encouraging environment at home. Had it not been so, I cannot imaginr where I would have stood.

Some pretty good side-effects of my new dwelling were newspaper and internet. I have always hated interactions. But newspaper connected me to the world quite comfortably. My interests and my ideas, they are mostly different from the society. I used to keep them to myself coz I thought I am the only one to think so. It didn’t stop me from believing in them, but certainly hampered effective communication. But thanks to The Times of India (my fav.. ^.^), I realised there are many people like me. I used to question existence of God, i found there are people called atheists (if you like to split hair, am actually agnostic). This is just an example. I found there is more to the world than religion and caste (which I detest to the core). Internet actually enabled me to connect with like-minded people. I read blogs, scanned forums and enjoyed the commentaries.

So, now thanks to all this support of family and technology and beyond, I have started my life in the actual brutal world. I have morphed into a pretty ugly chap with a hair-cum-nest, dangling limbs and awkward movements. Roadblocks abound and I continuously stumble and find another way, but that’s another story. :)

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Published in: on 29 Sep '10 at 5 pm  Leave a Comment  

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